I just returned from a trip to Puerto Vallarta with a group of gay friends. I was invited at the last minute, and I decided to join because, why not? In this pod of friends we all share a professional background in addition to the gay label: an academic, a psychiatrist, a resident psychiatrist, a computer engineer, a business analyst, and a physician –if memory serves well. We all seem to lean towards the nerdy side of personality: we watched Lord of the Rings, played board games, and solved puzzles.

I often think about the influence that your group of friends have on you, and the influence you exert on them. It seems a bit odd on the presence of responsibility in friendship, and the pressure to keep up. During this trip I felt the least intelligent in the group, and I’ve learned to be increasingly comfortable with that. English is my second language, so I try to forgive and give myself some grace.

If you’re the smartest one in the room, you’re in the wrong room. You are better off surrounded by people more accomplished than you. Friendship provides a mirror of yourself: it makes clear your own limits and imperfections.